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Who ate all the ties?

(May 05, 2010)

OPENING the pages of my Wiltshire Times a couple of weeks ago I noticed something truly shocking 
which graphically illustrated the depths to which this country has sunk.
A double page spread gave the election candidates an opportunity to sell themselves to the electorate and included a photo.
None of the male candidates in the South West Wiltshire constituency was pictured wearing a tie and of those contesting Chippenham only Duncan Hames sported neckware.
''I know that it might not be fashionable in some quarters to wear a tie but candidates who fail to do so in this part of the country obviously don't know this area that well,'' said Steve Dancey who has lived here all his life.
''Working class voters expect to see their MP smartly dressed and that goes for candidates as well - it might not matter to suburban Guardianistas but there's not too many of them in Westbury.
''Back in the dim and distant past I had the good fortune to meet the late Joe Grimmond on a number of occasions and to my huge surprise he knew the Westbury constituency very well indeed - particularly the Wylye Valley. (1)
''His advice if you were contesting rural areas like this was 'talk left, dress right' and it still holds today.
''I'm not sure what he would have make of Nick Clegg, who has done well so far but tonight used the appalling word 'sorted'.
''I'm sorry but do we really want a party leader who uses this word - especially one who was educated at St Pauls School in London - what does he take us for?''
Minus ties the candidate slooked like a cross between Plymouth brethren and Iranian politicians.

(1) - I later found out that Joe Grimmond was married to a daughter of Lady Violet Bonham-Carter, the daughter of Asquith, and another of her daughters, Mrs Cressida Ridley, lived at Stockton, hence Grimmond's surprising local knowledge.

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